Tuesday, November 13, 2012

Letter to my Children


Dear Children,
I am very disappointed in the way things are going around here and I am asking for your help in fixing some issues.

Your shoes, backpacks and lunch boxes are continuously left out on the floor in front of the entrance to our house.  This makes our house look messy and it is unacceptable.  I will not live this way any longer.  It is sloppy and dangerous and you need to figure out how to correct this.

Your homework is not being done in a timely manner.  Kees, your homework has not been completed for weeks past.   Coulter, I have to constantly remind you to do your homework and then while you are doing it I have to harp on you.  Sophia, your homework is much bigger and requires more attention.  You are smart enough to do it yet you choose to wait until almost the day it is due to get it done.  This makes me very anxious. 

I have news for you all; I have already done 1st, 3rd and 6th grades, as has your father.  We don’t need to do them again.  We are willing to help you do your homework if you have genuinely given it your best effort.  To date I have not seen any of you do that. 

Your rooms are a disaster….almost always.  This too is unacceptable.  I understand how they get that way but you need to make a short amount of time to clean your rooms when you take LOTS of time messing them up. 

General areas of the house….  This house is daddy’s and mine.  We worked very hard for many years to pay for the house, the things in it and for all the times we have together.   Your stuff is all over this house and this will stop…TODAY!  If you do not pick up your stuff I will take it and keep it.  The kid’s bathroom, the hallways, the living room, the kitchen, the dinning room, the fort, the storage closets, the basement, the TV room and the office are all common rooms.  This mean that they are for everyone to use equally.   Do you EVER see my clothes near the front door?  My lunch box or my things strewn all over the house?  NO, because I care about my home and my stuff.  Your things are NEVER to be left in our room or bathroom.  I will keep them if you do that any longer.

We like to share with you because we love you.  You have not earned these things we have.  To get things and a house you need to work hard.  Your previous endeavors have not shown that you are up to the task. 

You 3 are going to meet and decide what is going to be done about these issues.  You will decide what the penalty is for failure to follow the rules and you will willingly comply with your rules. 

If you don’t come up with a plan you will fall under my jurisdiction and that means follow my rules as I set them out.   A few things come to mind as penalties…  No sleep overs, no play dates, no computer time or games, no Wii, no AWOL, no candy, no dessert, no slot cars, no Legos….  I can go on all day. 

As a friend of mine once was told…..  “Your good time ends when my bad time begins.”  My bad time has begun…….

I will assist you in figuring out details of a plan but you will come up with an initial plan.  If the penalties for not cooperating are not harsh enough I will triple them or greater.  That means if you say, “If my room is a mess I only loose an hour of Wii.”  I can come back and say, “No, you loose it for a week.”  I advise coming up with reasonable penalties the first time. 

I am very serious about this.  I do not want to yell, be disappointed or be penalized for your poor behavior and homework habits any longer.  You will be taking personal accountability for your work and stuff. 

I look forward to working with you and to a cleaner, more organized and peaceful home. 

Love,
Mom

1 comment:

jabreman said...

H-

I knew I liked you. Now I think I love you. I hope that doesn't weird you out since we only just met.

Brilliant and so appropriate. You put my shapeless thoughts into perfect form talking about public and private spaces in a home. Thanks for another great parenting tip.

See you around pick up or drop off.

Jane (the new mom from LA)