Letting Go

I enjoy Halloween.  It’s always fun to see people decorating their homes and watching the kids get excited for Halloween night.  What could be better?  Dressing up and then getting rewarded with candy at EVERY house.  Awesome!  I am not as crazy about the candy part as the kids are. 

One of the things that could make you crazy is decorating and “getting ready” for every flipping holiday that comes along.   While I do like Halloween I do not go crazy with the “getting ready.”  I remember when getting ready meant carving your pumpkin and making sure you had a candle for it.  Now people have pumpkins hanging from trees like ornaments.  Really?  Halloween ornaments?  And ghosts….and corn stalks….and webs…and lights…..and, and, and….  I am glad there are people who get into it but it puts the pressure on the rest of us losers who just want to carve one pumpkin and hand out candy.   

As a side bar….When we were at Disneyland one of my favorite rides in the past had been the haunted house.  Not so much now.  I never understood “The Nightmare Before Christmas” and that is what the whole thing is about now.   What they may have there is a good idea though.  Why not decorate for Scary ThanksMas?  It would save me a lot of frustration and time.  The season is a full 2 months long, it would save time putting stuff up and down and I would have less to store.  Just saying…..ponder that one. 

We try to make it to the pumpkin patch each year.  We take the dog and the kids out to Sauvie Island and do all the pumpkin patch stuff; hay rides, barrel cow ride pulled behind a tractor, pet the animals, corn maze, get a few decorative gourds, and a few pumpkins to carve.  I think there is only one year where we haven’t made it out there.  I know last year we went when I had the flu.  It was a mission of love to take the kids out there.  Bob was out of town and I was dying but nooOOOooo….  We had to go to the pumpkin patch.  What was I thinking? 

This year we added in a trip up to mom and Ed’s house.  They have a very sweet neighbor, Pat, who grows pumpkins and then Ed and Pat carve each one of their grandkid’s names and all the names of their neighborhood’s kids into pumpkins.  It’s really cute.  It was a fun trip but again, this takes time. 

In past years we have procured pumpkins for each of the kids and me.  We clean them out and carve them. Of course this means I end up carving 4 pumpkins because the kids lose interest. We put decorations up outside.  Not a whole lot but we have some blinking lights with scary noises, a small smoke machine, a spider web (or two) and a few spiders.  My favorite part is decorating the front window.  I make a haunted house cut out and the kids do the rest.  They make pumpkins, Frankensteins, ghosts, witches etc.  They are all very cute.  Coulter is more into making lots of stuff while Sophia is more exacting.  Kees is more of a pumpkin man.  I cut ‘em out, he decorates ‘em.  This takes about an hour or two. 

All total we spend about 2 hours decorating, a couple hours carving and maybe 3 hours at the pumpkin patch and this year 24 hours up at mom and Ed’s.  And the coup de grâce, Spookarama at the kids school last Friday night.  This is a quintessential NE Portland school event.  There are games, a cake walk and this year there was even a haunted house. It’s not that all that is a ton of time but it’s just more stuff to do.  Life gets so busy that it’s hard to add stuff to the daily and weekly regular schedule.  We have horse, soccer, art classes and mad science.  Soon, soccer ends but basketball will take its place.  It’s a never ending list of stuff to do.  And just as soon as all the stuff is put up it’s time to take it all down again just so we can decorate for Thanksgiving.  I feel like we have done a fair amount of preparation but is it the right amount?

Yesterday we had a lazy day.  We were all up until midnight on Saturday at a party.  Then we all slept in.  Bob and I watched a lot of football and the boys played and watched movies.  Sophia was at a friend’s.  It was great fun for all and very relaxing.  In the late afternoon I said, “We haven’t carved pumpkins yet.”  And there was a collective, “oh.”  Not a single one of my kids thought that carving pumpkins was that big of a deal.  Really?  Here I was thinking, “Bad mom.”  My kids were thinking, “No biggie.” 

I am still a bit conflicted.  I can’t believe we won’t have a pumpkin carved.  After I drove the kids to school I considered going to get a pumpkin and carving it.  But then I thought, “If they don’t care why do I?”  I don’t know.  I like tradition but it makes me crazy having to do all the stuff.  I am not going to carve a pumpkin but I feel a bit guilty about it.  I know that is ridiculous but I do.  I can’t remember a Halloween where I haven’t carved a pumpkin…until now.  I will have to let it go….maybe….I don’t know….sheesh.

Tough Love?

Today is Friday the 14th of October. It is an in service day so my kids are out of school.  It is also the day my housekeeper comes. 

As most people who have a housekeeper know, you must clean the house for the housekeeper. Why?  Because if you have kids and they have toys there are toys all over the floor in their rooms and in the playroom. And if those toys have pieces, think Lego, Tinker toys, blocks, Playmobil, train sets etc. the housekeeper will just throw them into the closest bin of whatever.  The next time someone goes to use said toys the pieces are all over the place and mixed up with all the other toys.  That's no fun. So.....you need to make sure the toys are picked up and put in their proper place. Ultimately, it saves time and frustration. 

Two more pieces of information.  #1 - Sophia had a friend over to spend the night. #2 - It's hard for the housekeeper to clean the house when the kids are there.  Today I needed to make sure the house was picked up, that Sophia and her pal cleaned up their sleep over mess, that I had a plan that was fun for the kids and out of the house and that we were ready to walk out the door when the housekeeper got there at 10:00.  Check, check, check and check...... I thought. 

When the housekeeper arrived I needed to show her something upstairs. We went up and when I walked by Sophia's room it was a mess. There were clothes everywhere, art supplies all over and just general chaos. I had been trying to get everything in order for almost 2 hours. Her responsibilities were cleaning her room, cleaning up the sleepover stuff, eating breakfast (that I made), and getting dressed. This seemed reasonable for a 10 year old in a 2 hour time frame.  I was more than a little annoyed. This was about the 5th time I had asked her to get on it. 

When I came downstairs I yelled and told her to clean up her room. I said I was really mad. Then I went out to the car with the boys and left. I knew this would freak her out but I did it to make a point. It gave me space to calm down and made a point without yelling.  I'm sick of yelling.  I wasn't leaving for the day, I went to Starbucks and to the bank. Sophia, of course, thought I was so mad that we left for the day.

She called 3 times but my phone was in the car and the ringer was off. I called back within 2 minutes. I knew she'd be calling so I knew to check. She was hysterical.  She was sobbing and apologizing and begged me to come home. Of course I did. It was my plan all along. 

When I got home she was standing outside crying. "Mom, I'm so sorry. I'll do anything in the World to make it up to you....ANYthiiiiing." While a part of me was feeling really sorry for her, I remember being that sobbing 10 year old, the other part of me thought, "Good, I think she understood that I am serious."  It was nice to make a point without having to yell. 

During our car ride I talked to her. I told her that she needed to calm down. She said that when she called she thought I was driving and crying and that I had crashed. That's what she got out of me not answering my phone. I told her the reality was my ringer was off. 99% of the time that I didn't answer that was why.  She continued to be overly upset. I told her I was done and that she needed to calm down. I apologized for not telling her I was leaving. I told her I knew she was safe at home and that I needed a few minutes to calm down.  She finally did calm a bit.

When we arrived at the play place I held her hands, looked her in the eye and told her that no matter what I would always love her. I said that I don't like yelling and I needed a few minutes away to calm down myself. I expect to ask her to do things once and have that be respected. We then hugged. I asked her if we could start our day together over. She perked right up and said, "Good morning mom." and had a smile on her face. 

I don't know if I did the right thing. This is my first time being a mom, having 3 kids, having a girl and having a 10 year old. I know it's her job to subvert my ideas and requests and that it is and will be very frustrating. I know that in the years to come my frustration will increase before it decreases again.  I am doing the best that I can. I want to impress upon Sophia that I am serious without causing her harm.  I pray I did not cause her harm. I love her more than I ever understood a parent could love a child. I believe most parents feel the same way.  

I am trying to figure this parenting thing out and move through it with grace. Today I didn't have much grace.  And as soon as I think I've figured out how to work with Sophia, Coulter and Kees will be making me crazy. Actually they already have their moments. And if there ever comes a time when I think I have it all figured out they'll change or be off starting their own independent lives. 

We parents are challenged to do this job with essentially no training. We have only our parents as examples. Sometimes that's good and other times it isn't as helpful. 

When my generation was growing up the rules were different. Our parents could hit us or yell at us even out in public and no one even took notice.  The schools had a policy of corporal punishment and that was fine with our parents.  We were left in the car when they went into a store. I remember because one time I burnt my finger on the cigarette lighter in the car when I was 6. I never did tell my mom. We were left at home alone at a young age. We didn't attend music classes, gymnastics, horse lessons or much of any other lessons until we were at least in Jr. High. We walked to school alone or with a buddy and we did it in rain, snow, hail or heat and it didn't even occur to us to call a parent to pick us up.  We spent our summers outside from breakfast to dinner time. Our parents didn't know where we were or what we were doing. We climbed trees and took risks that would have made our parents throw up if they saw the danger we were in. We didn't use sun screen or hand sanitizer.  We talked to strangers. We threw rocks and pine cones at each other and used garbage can lids as shields.  Yes, yes, it was a different time.

So many of these things would be illegal today. Most of it would not be tolerated by society. I get sideways looks for letting Sophia climb tall trees. Please, I was a champion tree climber. I get it. 

So all that information is just to point out that it's different now.  That the "training" we received doesn't necessarily apply to our kids. And, it was that way for our parents. When my mom was a kid she started working. There was nothing wrong with child labor. So they did the best they could while raising us as well. 

I know this has been a lot of rambling but I needed to write it all down. I want to be a loving, helpful mom and I also want respect. I don't want to yell but I do want to make my point. I need help from my kids with their things and our house. I want them to have fun but I want them to understand that their fun takes my time, money, patience and love. I am not going to a play place because it's fun for me. I am going because I love them. I do not want the process of going to the place to be excruciating. What will not be fun for me anyway becomes almost unbearable if they don't cooperate.  That is what I want them to know.  And I do believe that Sophia will be very cooperative the next time we are headed out to do something fun.

Disneyland!!!

My mom has wanted to go on a big trip with our family for a while. The last time we went on a big trip was 3 years ago when we went to Mexico for a week. It was great fun but any big trip like that is expensive so they’re hard to do. In January she talked to me about going to Disneyland with our family. She funded a good portion of the trip so how could I say no? I couldn’t. The kids are only little once and it does pass pretty quickly.

We planned this trip in January, bought the tickets in February, kept it from the kids until August and finally went on our trip in October. Here was my only dilemma…….

SCHOOL DAYS VS. LESS CROWDS AND LINES

When these two ideas clash, less crowds will win over school days every time. What is the point in going to the HAPPIEST PLACE ON EARTH if you can’t have fun because you are spending all your time in line? There would not be a point, at least not for me.

The decision was made last February that we would pull the kids out of school for a good time. Done. It’s a good thing too because even with school in session Disneyland was quite busy. They say it was at 50%. If that is the case I pray that I am never there on a busy day. That would be torture.

We left Portland on Sunday the 2nd and flew into the John Wayne airport. We rented a van and went to our hotel, the Meridian Inn and Suites. It was great. We had a refrigerator and a microwave which were key in our saving money scheme. There were doors between the bedroom and the living room which was key in our sanity scheme. Breakfast was included and we were only 3 miles from Disneyland. Wahoo!!!

On Sunday night we drove over to Downtown Disney for dinner and to get a lay of the land. It was a good way to start our adventure. We had dinner at the Rain Forrest Café. The food was mediocre at best but the atmosphere was fun and the kids were thrilled. They thought it was great and that is what this was all about.

After dinner we wandered around Downtown Disney. There is so much to see and so many places that your kids want you to spend all your money! The Lego Store was a top priority for the boys so we spent quite a bit of time there. Before we left each one of the kids got $65.00 to spend on whatever they wanted. The boys each got a small Lego set. Sophia bought a glass lion. We managed to get out of there without buying anything else. That was no small feat! We then waited around until 9:30 to see the fireworks. Mom and I wanted to see them and it was the only night that would have fireworks while we were there. Bob and Kees....they weren't as excited.

Monday morning it was time to go to the one, the only….DISNEYLAND!!! Everyone was excited. We had studied the maps, downloaded the apps, packed a lunch and were ready to roll. We had a bit of a bump in the road when Kees got a kink in his neck. It seems strange to see a 6 year old kid holding his neck and crying. It was really hurting him. We plied him with meds, let him rest up for a few minutes and then we were off.

The first order of the day was to find Mickey. We hopped on the train and went to the far side of the park to Mickey’s house. It’s a strange place and I wouldn’t want to be in there on any serious kind of meds. I mean you could really trip out. At the end of the trek through Mickey’s house you get to have your picture taken with Mickey. We were shuttled into a room and there he was! We all smiled and had a great group photo shoot with Mickey. He was thrilled….and we were too. The obligatory picture with Mickey was done now it was PARTY TIME.

The next few days all blur together. I know that we spent the first bit of time in Toontown and then went on A Small World. Over the next few days we were all over the place. The kids LOVED Autotopia. Autotopia is little gas powered cars that are on a track. The adults pressed the gas pedals and the kids steered….as best they could. Sophia’s driving did not excite me about her being 16 too soon. She was banging our car left and right. I was laughing….hard. Sophia was annoyed with me.

One of the highlights for Sophia and Kees was their Jedi training. Coulter did NOT want to do it. There was training about 4 times per day. When you get over there you have to be picked. The "instructors" go through a routine and the kids learn the basics. Then, when you least expect it, Darth Vader and Darth Maul show up. It's a good thing those kids were trained. Kees took down Darth Vader and Sophia took Darth Maul.

We all went on Space Mountain. While most of us survived it without trauma, the boys were NOT interested in going on that again. Star Tours was a group favorite. I didn’t realize until our 2nd “tour” but each one of the little rooms or whatever you go in / on, are different. It’s in 3-D and really fun.

Mom and Ed’s favorite ride was the Indiana Jones Ride. While we loved it, apparently it is a problem child for Disney. It breaks down all the time. We went there first thing in the morning one day and went straight in. When we got all the way in it was announced that it was closed. Bummer….except that the guy who announced that it was closed had a little trivia contest. If you guessed one of the questions right you got a pass to go to the front of the line of ANY ride. Mom got one right and we got a pass. Yippie. The ride was open about 20 minutes later and we went on a wild ride. Very cool ride. Again, the boys were not interested in going again. We took our pass and headed straight for the Matterhorn. On the way we picked up a Fast Pass to Star Tours. The beauty of using our VIP pass on the Matterhorn is there is no Fast Pass for that ride. It’s one of the few. AND….the wait for the Matterhorn seemed to always be an hour or more. See above…I hate waiting in long lines.

Everyone seemed to like the Matterhorn especially the boys. They were thrilled and wanted to go on it again immediately. I had to explain the line thing and that we couldn’t just hop the line any ole time we wanted AND it was time to go on Star Tours again. Good times. Some other favorites were Astro Blasters, Splash Mountain, Small World and the Jungle Cruise. Splash Mountain was one of our last rides and Sophia, who was in the front of the boat / log got soaked. Ask her about it. It was hilarious.

Kees was pretty funny when we came out of It’s A Small World. He was singing the song but replacing Small with Big because……”Mom, it’s a big world. There were 13 worlds in there.” The kid counted every room we went in. I don’t know if he was accurate or not but he is definitely Bob’s kid.

We caught the raucous Mickey’s Soundsational Parade at the end of two of our days there. It was LOUD but lots of fun. All the major characters were there.

On our last day we went to California Adventure first and went straight to the TOWER OF TERROR. Again, the boys said, “No way.” Grandma took them to the Bugs Life area and Bob, Ed, Sophia and I went into the tower. There was no line so I was really happy. This ride is a total riot…..I LOVED it. It tells a story of some people who were shocked to death in a Twilight Zone type event. Then you get in the elevator, an elevator with seat belts. It shoots you up about 15 stories, the elevator doors open to the outside and then drops you the same 15 or so floors. It was hilarious. You go totally weightless for about 3 seconds. My purse was hovering in front of my face. When it was over Sophia and I got right back on. Awesome.

We also hit the Muppet 3-D show. Cute. And we went on Flying over California. It made mom sick from the motion. We all liked it though, all except for the feet hanging over our heads. It’s a pretty cool ride. Lastly we went on the Grizzly River Run where I got soaked. Not such a big deal except that I was wearing white pants….that were fairly see through when wet. Yeah, that was a pretty picture.

California Adventure was not the same as Disneyland and we weren’t feelin’ it so we went back to the land…it is much better. We spent 90% of our time at Disneyland and loved almost every minute of it.

In the last moments we bought a few souvenirs and trinkets. We spent a few last moments in Downtown Disney and then headed home to the hotel for a swim. My feet were killing me. Yikes.

We did take one day off from Disney when we were in California. It’s a good thing too because it rained REALLY HARD and that is coming from someone who lives in the rain belt. Mom, Ed, Sophia and I went to check out the Chrystal Cathedral. It was pretty cool even in the rain. The docent there was charming and we were all impressed by the GIANT pipe organ. I honestly can say I have never seen an organ that big and my church in Atlanta had 18,000 members. We also did homework, saw a movie and went out for dinner that day. It was fun and relaxing day.

Friday was pack up, check out and fly home day. It went quickly and fairly painlessly. Our kids were good travelers and our grandparents were great companions. We got along all week and had a really successful adventure. For me it went pretty quickly. It wasn’t a relaxing trip but it was definitely fun. 3 days at Disneyland was perfect for our family. I think it was a bit long in the “land” for Mom and Ed. They were there to spend time with the kids, not to go on rides and such. I was impressed that they were right there the whole time and went on every ride. Mom skipped a couple but Ed didn’t miss a thing. And that part worked out well too. When mom didn’t want to go on a ride it was generally one that the boys didn’t want to ride either so we all had someone with us or someone to watch over. Perfect! Thanks again to Mom and Ed for being a major sponsor of this event. We wouldn’t have gone if it were not for your encouragement and enthusiasm. I hope this is a trip that we all remember and hold onto for a very long time.

Freedom

I have been waiting for a LONG time for a bit more freedom. I have had a kid with me most of the day for almost 11 years. While I love my babies I really needed some time without them. They need lots of attention and require me to stop whatever I am doing to help them all the time. This isn’t anything that you don’t already know. Parents everywhere know this whole heartedly. If you don’t have kids then it’s a bit harder to comprehend. During your waking hours hire someone to poke you, jump on you or call for you every 5 minutes for 10 years…..it’s like that. And for each additional kid add a poker, jumper, interrupter to the mix. Good times….

Don’t get me wrong. I wouldn’t have had it any other way. I am very proud of my kids and I think they’re terrific. They are well mannered, play nicely most of time and are very lovely. But even still they can drive me bonkers. Like right this minute, they have interrupted me 32 times since I started this posting. I am not joking.

I am only one week in and I already feel like a different person. All 3 of my kids are in school this year and I feel a whole new sense of freedom. I haven’t done much yet but I have big plans. This week I walked and climbed the stairs twice, rode my bike twice and had lunch with friends 3 times. I don’t want to accomplish too much too soon. It might set precedence and I certainly don’t want to do that! ;-) And having all that fun didn’t stop me from getting done twice as much as I usually did with the poker, jumper, interrupters at home with me.

At 2:30 I have been coming home and getting ready to pick Kees up from school at 2:45. We come home and chat for a few minutes and then Coulter and Sophia come home on their own. I am relaxed and ready to have my kids home again. I miss them and I want to hear about their day. I know this is the beginning of them flying the coop but right now is such a great time for us as a family.

Sophia said to me on Wednesday, “Mom, you’ve been in a really good mood.” Believe me, it’s because I have had a break. I feel badly that I haven’t been in as good of a mood and that it is so recognizable but I do feel so much better. This is the job that I have been waiting for. This is the kind of mothering I was made for. When I have “me” time I am much more apt to have quality “them” time. It comes much more easily. I have big plans to get things done….eventually. But for now I am REALLY enjoying a bit of freedom.

I am a Supportive Mom

I love my kids. I don’t think anyone would deny that. I think they’re awesome and better than most kids. It’s my job to think that. I tell them when they’ve done a good job and I don’t pussy foot around when they have not done a good job. I give their teachers permission to correct them and I would never say, “Oh my kid would naaaeeeaaver do that.” Because they would. What do people think? Teachers don’t know kids and their behaviors? It’s what they do. They know kids. And I believe that most of them are in it because they genuinely like kids and want to help them. I choose to believe that my kid’s teachers are acting in the best interest of my children and their class mates. Until further notice, I will believe this. I have had teachers thank me for being down to earth and working with them to come to solutions instead of taking my kid’s side and denying that my kid could possibly misbehave. I know they can and I know they have.

I am not the “get on the floor” kind of mom, I am not a “helicopter” parent, I am not overly protective and I am not one to “praise them for nothing” kind of mom. That makes me NUTS!....Oh little so and so, you kicked the ball during soccer, yay, good for you. Shut up! You are supposed to kick the ball during soccer. Terrific, they hit the lowest rung. The other day I saw a little girl (about 2) playing on her mom’s IPhone at the soccer practice for her older brother. A ball rolled off the soccer field and bumped up against her. Her mom bent down and said, “Good for you Lucy. You did such a good job stopping the ball. We’re going to call you Goalie.” And then she proceeded to pat her on the head and continue with the oohing and aaaahing. Give me a break. The kid wasn’t hurt and she wasn’t even paying attention. I would be more apt to call her Door Stop or Stump but certainly not Goalie. That kid is going to grow up thinking that she is Super Kid and then she’s going to go out in the world and wonders why everyone isn’t awed by her presence. “Well Door Stop….there are LOTS of Door Stops out there. What else do you have?” She’s not doing her kid any favors.

I expect my kids to do more, work hard, be kind and try their best. I am not going to blow smoke or give them false praise. I make these promises to my kids because I am a Supportive Mom……. I will heap on the praise when it comes to true effort being made. I will cheer for you when you have a game and I will really cheer if you are doing your best. You don’t have to be the best as a matter of fact you can even be the worst. If you are giving it (whatever it is) your best effort I will be your cheer leader. I will be your advocate. I will be fierce to protect you. I never thought I was very tough but I can be downright scary to ANYONE that might try and hurt you in any way. I will help you learn. I will protect you from the things that I can and I will comfort you when you’re hurt by the things that I can’t. I will cry with you and I will laugh with you. I will support you. I will guide you. I will love you…..always….and I will love you more than you can possibly understand until you have a child of your own. I am your Supportive Mom.

On the Blog Again....I Can't Wait to Get on the Blog Again

It has been far too long since I have blogged regularly. It isn’t because I don’t want to blog. It’s because I have a busy life and family. I love blogging and at times it’s been the thing that has kept me sane…..or as sane as I am I guess.

It’s been an up and down week for me. Do you want the good news or the bad news?..................................................................................................................................................................................... Well? Alright then, you get the bad news first. I like to end on an upswing.

The bad news is that my car was prowled last night. One of my kids, I won’t say which one, left the car unlocked. My kid went in there to get something they forgot. I remember thinking, “I need to make sure the car is locked.” And then life got busy and I forgot. They took my GPS, my speaker for hands free talking in the car, a bunch of gift cards (but not all of them) and my Leatherman multi tool, a total of about $400 worth of stuff. No it’s not the end of the world but it is a huge violation. The van was in our drive way. No it wasn’t locked but damn….it was in MY DRIVE WAY. I have filed a report but I don’t expect to get any of that stuff back. It is yet again a reminder to all of us that we need to lock EVERYTHING. It is very disheartening. So that is that.

Now the good news. I am happy to report that there is much more good news than bad news. First, while we’re on the topic of stolen stuff, I got my bike back! Yep, it is the bike that was stolen in April. It was new and had all my cool stuff on it, air horn, odometer, bell, lights etc. It was in great shape other than some cob webs. I knew that it wasn’t stolen to be ridden; it was stolen to be sold for cash. It was found at a pawn shop. The only bummer part is I had to pay $40 to the pawn shop or they would have held it until they could prosecute and collected some of their money. It was worth it. I couldn’t have been happier about that. I don’t know what I am going to do with it but it’s back.

The kids are back in school. It means getting up early and I did have my kids trained to sleep in this summer. I liked that part. Actually, we had a great summer and did lots of stuff. The kids, Bob and I traveled, played and had a very successful staycation. We enjoyed going to the pool but I couldn’t get anything done when I was at the pool every day for hours on end. I enjoyed just hanging out but things were NOT getting done. I was sick of “bored” kids, making food and cleaning up the kitchen all day, doing extra laundry and the general mess that goes along with having 3+ kids in the house all the time. I was done with summer.

And this school year is better. Why you ask…………because all 3 of my kids are in school from 8:45 to 2:45. 6 years ago when I had Kees I had him in August so my son could go to school when he turned 5. He wasn’t ready. I was totally ready but he was not. I debated whether I should send him anyway but in the end I decided that he needed one more year of preschool. It was a place where he was totally happy. Shoot. But I have to say it was absolutely the best thing for him. He is a totally different kid this year. He’s confident, more adventurous, he’s independent and just more rounded out. He is definitely ready for school.

Today was day #4 of full day kindergarten and he is totally happy. I love his teacher and so does he. I have known her for 6 years and she lives near-by. I told her this summer that he can be really difficult but all she saw was this funny, smart little boy running around being friendly. Yesterday they had a fire drill. When they got outside she had to call roll. When she got to Kees’ name she called it. He didn’t respond. She called again. He didn’t respond and she started to get nervous. After about a minute she saw him and asked him if he heard her. He said, “Yes.” And when she asked him why he didn’t respond he said because he couldn’t hear the “S” on his name. She asked, “Did you know I was calling your name?” And again he said, “Yes.” And then she gave it to him. He knew she was serious and when it comes to safety he could not be doing that. She told me this story in the hall at drop off and then said that she could see what I was talking about this summer. She really understands now where I am coming from with this kid. Fabulous, an ally. Maybe she can do what I have not been able to accomplish.

Coulter has a great teacher too. He has Ms. Barry. She’s the same one that Sophia had. It’s nice to know your teacher. She is what he needs. He doesn’t give me lots of information but he comes home happy every day. “Coulter, how was your day?” He reports, “It was GREAT!” every day.

Coulter and Sophia are now in the same building so they can ride to and from school together. This is great too. It saves me about a half hour in the morning since I don’t have to drop them off. And now they’re coming home together too. Again, a half hour saved. I’m loving that. Sophia sends me a text when they get there and another one when they’re leaving the school. It has been a great way to communicate.

And Sophia…. She had a tough second half of the year. It was very important to me that Sophia have a good year academically but also socially. She had some middle school type problems with friends last year and was told by her teacher to, “Handle it. You need to figure it out.” By the end of the year I was done with that answer. THEY’RE 10 and they need help.

Sophia’s teacher this year is not afraid to step in and help them figure out these issues. I talked to her on the second day of school and she said, “I see the issues that other teachers might not and I know how to handle them.” She has been a middle school teacher for 11 years and has a background in counseling. Hooray!!!! She said if kids are having a hard time getting along and they set a boundary with someone, that someone needs to respect the boundary. I appreciated that. We agreed that everyone needs to be civil to one another and show respect but they don’t all have to be buddies. It was a relief when I met her and I am grateful that she isn’t afraid to get in the middle of the kids and their issues.

Sophia had been very concerned because she is in a mixed age class with 4th graders. I didn’t care about that so long and the teacher was awesome. She is. And Sophia hasn’t mentioned the 4th grade “problem” this week. I think it is becoming less and less of an issue even to her.

We also had a really nice visit from my mom and Ed. They were here for a short time but it was nice. Sometimes when my mom comes it can be really stressful for me. I am her daughter and at times she still feels the need to “mother me” to a degree that feels like torture. I try to make it nice for them and I think I do. But no matter how low impact a guest is, it is still a lot of work. Sometimes my mom is low impact….other times, not so much. This time was low impact and nice. It was truly lovely.

Soccer started when school started. Coulter has had 2 practices and 1 game and has been playing really well. It’s been great fun to see him grow and develop. He is a natural athlete and I would love to see at least one of my kids excel in sports or at least a sport. Just like school….when I ask him how soccer was he says, “GREAT!” I love that kids attitude.

Kees starts soccer tomorrow and is more than a little excited. He has to wear full soccer gear just to kick the ball across the street with his brother. He got Coulter’s old soccer shoes, got his own ball and borrowed Coulter’s jersey. You can see how proud he is to be doing all the stuff the big kids have been doing all along. He is part of the big kid gang now and he is feeling it.

We enjoyed the last 2 days of the pool. It closes for the season on Friday but the open swim was over on Sunday. There was the ice cream social at school and everyone had a great time. PTA (I am on the board) started last night and we have our first general membership meeting next week. Back to school night is tonight and tomorrow for the 2 campuses. Horse riding starts soon, soccer is in full swing, Coulter may be taking an art class after school, everyone seems to have friends and be getting along. We are back in to the full swing of school. So far it has been a great year.

And I have some time! I am thrilled. It’s only the first week and I haven’t done much but I did go out to lunch today and am going tomorrow and the next day too! I have done more laundry, organized a few things, gone through mail and paid bills. It has been nice to do it without having someone interrupt me every few minutes. I will do more but for now I am enjoying the bit of a break.

And I started walking the stairs again. I have partners set up for 2 times per week, Tuesday and Friday. I need to start yoga, yes Rebecca….yoga. There is a studio near my house and I am going to go. I remember when I was growing up I would laugh at my dad when he was stretching because he was so stiff. Pay back is a bitch. I’m not laughing now.

So there is the good the bad and the ugly. Here at the Leek’s it’s mostly good and I plan on keeping it that way.

A Long Time Commin'

As anyone in the northwest knows, our winter and spring SUCKED! There is no other way to put it. It rained for 6 months right on into JULY. No joke…..July. It was so awful and horribly depressing to many of us, me included. It was so bad that the parks department cancelled spring soccer and that has NEVER happened before. I didn’t realize how bad it was until I went to California for about 10 days in June and spent time in the sun. After about the 3rd day I started feeling better….dramatically better. It was the natural vitamin D. It had to be. After that trip we chased the sun for almost a month getting home around July 14th. It was still winter in Portland. I caught a lot of flak for being gone during what often is “the nicest time of year in Portland.” I am glad we did what we did. I don’t think I could have taken much more rain.

As a caveat, I know there were devastating tornados and floods in the south and stifling heat for most of the country. I am not saying that what we suffered was worse or even comparable; it just messes with one’s psyche. I pray that those who lost their homes will find adequate shelter and peace. And those that have been in the 100’s forever will find relief. That is awful too.

Since mid July it’s been pretty nice off and on until about 3 weeks ago. There are some strange things blooming around here. My clematis that blooms in March has flowers on it. The blackberries are still on the vine. Strawberries were more than 3 weeks late etc. It was nuts. The past couple weeks have been in the mid 70’s which I consider to be perfect. I have been happy with that.

Today it’s 94. For those of us that aren’t used to the heat it feels pretty hot. I am grateful for my AC. I am not complaining about the heat just saying it is fairly warm. It’s supposed to be hot tomorrow too. We have the pool across the street so the kids are pretty happy with that. And the ultimate summer treat around here SNO CONES! They are really quite good.

So let it be known that I am NOT complaining about the heat. I promised I wouldn’t if it ever got hot. I am fine with it. We’ll swim, have sno cones, turn on the AC and enjoy the fact that summer finally arrived. It was a long time commin’ and we deserve a bit ‘o heat.